About the Research

In the past few years, media attention has focused on varied challenges faced by mothers in balancing paid work and childcare. A recurring story has been that of the mommy ‘opt-out’ which - as reported in many newspapers, magazines, blogs, and discussion forums - refers to how North American mothers are ‘opting out’ of employment when they have children. This social narrative has set off a large debate on how women are actually ‘forced out’, as Pamela Stone notes in her book Opting Out, or, indeed, that they are, according to Amy Richards’s book title, still Opting In. Coupled with this opt out/opt in debate, there has also been a wide and long discussion about mommy wars, perfect mothers, mommy myths, mommy olympics, and the possibilities and perils of equal or shared parenting as well as what it means to be a primary caregiving dad or a stay-at-home dad. From this political and personal landscape, I am intrigued by one stunning statistic. In nearly one-third of two earner (heterosexual) households in the United States and Canada, it is women who are now the primary breadwinners.

On the one hand, it is tempting to view these households as examples of a spectacular gender role reversal. On the other hand, we can wonder whether women, in fact, take on a double burden of earning and care, or the well-known ‘second shift ‘that sociologist Arlie Hochschild wrote about twenty years ago. What we do know is that female breadwinner households tend to earn less than male breadwinner families, which means that money can be tight for buying in household help. Thus, if more and more women are bringing home the bread, are they also managing their homes, being ‘mom-in-chief’ (as Michelle Obama refers to herself), nurturing the children, making meals (baking or serving bread) and cleaning up after that bread is eaten? If women have secured access to the responsibilities and rewards of breadwinning, then what about the pleasures of life? Is it just bread? Is it bread and roses? Or bread and roses… and the kitchen sink?

I am interested in hearing about the experiences of women who are, or were, primary breadwinners in Canada and the United States. I want to hear what your challenges and successes are. What supports you and constrains you? What is the role of your partner, your family, your friends, your kin? If you are a single mother, how have you juggled mothering and paid work? What do you let go of and what do you hold onto? If you were a primary breadwinner who shifted out of that role, why did you do so? If you are a longtime primary breadwinner, what has helped you to stay there? Whether you are married, common law, single, divorced, lesbian or heterosexual, I am interested in hearing your stories.

This is an interesting historic moment to explore such issues. The United States has its first president who speaks openly about being raised by a single mother who combined working with studying and caring, as well as by a maternal grandmother who was the family breadwinner. Prominent female politicians such as Hilary Clinton and Sarah Palin are, or have been, their family’s main breadwinner. The American First Lady, Michele Obama, has indicated that one of her priorities will be the challenges faced by mothers balancing paid work and caring responsibilities.

The research conducted through this discussion forum, as well as through in-depth interviews with Canadian and American mothers, will produce a book, tentatively titled Bread and Roses and the Kitchen Sink. In addition to working from your stories, I will be tracking the differing social, policy and economic landscapes of Canada and the United States. (American readers might be interested to know that Canada, for example, has generous parental leave benefits available to both mothers and fathers; and one of our provinces, Quebec, has paternity leave (‘daddy weeks’) and highly subsidized daycare.)